week 8 en 9

Above here you see my slide of our presentation from the mid-term. I started with my own sense-self archive what I made small because there are some images you might not want to see, and next to it I putted my Instagram. Here you can see what I normally show to the world and what I decided to research. From on this research I collected theory, #, social media accounts, disabled artists and books to understand myself and my own personal research. At the moment I'm still looking for a way to put my research into creative work.

Amy explained to me that I don't have to come with new work but can create work from references. With this I decided that after our meeting on Friday I want to start brainstorming about what can I do. Today when I write this we gonna have a workshop with Amy about Zine. With this specific task I think I can be brought further in my process.

Julie asked me if I can make a more organizational archive of the things I collected. That is why I decided to make a excel sheet with everything I collected in more sub-themes. This is not my end product but just a easy way to reference or look into what I did because now my #archive looks more like a process book. That is also how I collected for the research but to create a better overview I make the sheet.

During the feedback we had about our presentation the teachers wanted us to find a way to come more together. I'm also a little bit struggling because normally on my academy the guidelines are more strict but because our group all look from sense-self we don't speak the same language or look into the subjects. Still we all see that there are things overlapping and with the overlapping things we gonna create our archive.

Group meeting notes:

In the group meeting we have every Friday evening we discussed the mid-term feedback. With coming more together and how we decided instead of a website to create a digital zine. A magazine. Where we all come more together because of the same graphic outlines. Think about typography, and layout. With this we are currently doing research about the style. Think about the cover and the inside. In our introduction we want to write how we come together for example we are all unseen. We are all researching something that goes off when we enter our house. It is a kind of code-switch between the world and between your own world (your house) or what you do inside your house. With this we decide to create a magazine. We are not sure about everything but we made a planning that by the end of the week we all know what we are gonna create and the week after we show the process of creation.

For the Zine Workshop I choose ‘I do nothing’ it is a multi-media series created by Charlie Fitz and Oscar Vinter in 2019. And it is about the pressure to perform a narrow understanding of disability in public places to avoid confrontation.

Link: https://www.sickofbeingpatient.com/i-do-nothing

With choosing this I was thinking about my personal feedback from the mid-term presentations to use references from other work into your own work. I decided to try it out for this specific topic. Not because it comes close to my end work for the archive but just as seen how I can apply it to my collected work.

What did I do?

First I watched the video on sick of being patient and from on this I started analyzing with the questions Amy gave us in class. The answers can be found in the red box. It was important to me before I started creating to understand how I could put the same kind of feeling into my visual/collage that Charlie & Oscar did.

The background is a secret language made by my unseen archive. You can not see that this is made from the PNG under here. With this I decided to draw 3 important organs. I could only do three because I had 10 minutes left to also make it into a gif.

With this work I have the feeling that it can bring me further in creation my own creative work for the archive. I decided today that I'm gonna make graphics combined with stories or quotes for the digital ZINE me and my group are gonna make as one archive.

Because I had to go to the hospital I could not finish the class. That's why I made the homework later

Question: How/what do we perceive :take an item you've collected and identify what is in the background? (of our attention, of the objects)

I decided to take the Archive. Within this Archive I was thinking what can I do with it. How can I show the story behind it. Then I thought what if I give the persons a face. Why does this certain persons have to start a go fund me? The story behind them can be headed under their story. Lucky almost all this go fund me are successful. It is positive that we humans still help each other.

Group meeting notes:

In the group meeting we discussed the idea about the different houses/chapters. Everybody liked the idea but of course we are still in a process and looking for how everything can come together in the end. I also presented my idea with stories and graphic/visuals drawings. I'm really excited to start upcoming week with some research and drawings.

Archive - Creative work

I've been really thinking how I can put my Archive into creative work. As a group we make a zine and I came up with a idea to make the cover like a house. Because all our stories are personal and focused on our own identity I thought it was a good idea to make the zine like a house. With every new story you come into a new 'house' virtual. Our Zine is gonna be digital because of the circumstances.

So my part in the zine are gonna be stories combined with drawings. First I'm gonna collect some inspirations for the drawings I want to make. I'm not sure of the drawings are gonna be in a hidden language or it is more about exposing how it feels to be chronic ill. This is what I want to research this upcoming week and after that research I want to start with more final drawings.

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Archive - Research drawings

What I find interesting in this drawing is the colors, the graphic style and also the choice of objects. Only I miss the kind of emotion you can get through a drawing. I think it is to dull to tell a specific story
(@charliefjitz)

This is a drawing made by me. It is a overdrawing of my archive. I'm just still thinking that I don't know if a secret language is the best choice because it is more about showing and giving visibility to disabled females. So it must be sad if I hide my identity again. But I can think about a way to explore the map with graphics.

I started collecting drawings because I wanted to get some inspiration to get started. What I found interesting from Amy's class is that it is not always necessary to create your own new work you can also work with references from others. With this references I want to understand the kind of feeling I wanted to create within my drawings. I want to show the feeling of being sick in the drawing combined with quotes and stories. Instead of doing a photoshoot it is a editorial made with drawings.

This is a drawing combined with text. It is drawn in a minimal way. You can see in the drawing that she feels unseen. It tells more a story to me than the stories above.

@emayaartstudio

In this picture it is not clear what you see, but I still see frustration and pain. When I researched the image it are pills under a scanner. With this she showed small objects what are part of her daily life.

@vickybass

From all the above this 2 say the most to me. It is not clear at first eye-sight what they want to say but at the first one I see a cycle. This cycle goes about in my eyes how you can keep up with daily life as a disabled. The pressure you feel and the intertwining your body has to do to get through.

The second image with the small men running in them reminds me of vains. I don't know if it's just me but it reminds me of running and running but never come where you want to come. Why this both drawings speak to me because they come close with my inner-self body. It comes close with the feeling I got from researching the past weeks about disabilities in myself and others. It was something I always closed my eyes for and now it may be exposed. (but only for now ;))

@monicaramos

Drawing 1 is based on the words of Johanna Hedva. For the ones who were never meant to survive but did. I started with 1 drawing but I did not get the emotion with this. After the groups meeting and examples of our digital zine I decided to make it a small serie. So it will also be a clickable page with a small story related to the sentence. Under here I show my process.

It shows the body is on fire. I founded it a interesting illustration but I kept having the feeling something was missing. (emotional) How did this feeling come etc? I tried many things with backgrounds etc but that was all not it. Then I realized why don't I make it a upbuild thing. So I take you to the process of inflammation, pain, struggle in the inside of the body on a 'daily' basis.

The colors are not the colors I made into the indesign file. That is why I decided to upload a screenshot under here from the final work. As you see there the colors match better.

I decided to change the titel. Because I still wanted to do something with my own personal archive. In the end it all started from my sense-self so I would find it a waste to let that go. That's why I decided to make my work differently. And give it a different titel. I want to discuss in class tomorrow if everything has to be in 1 style for the different pages. Because we discussed that we don't have to have one clear house style. I'm curious if my pencil must be seen back in all my graphics/drawings. If it's yes I have to find a way to translate this style in all my work without looking the same.

I kept thinking about the end result of the class from Amy. I liked how I made my personal archive into a secret language. Even though my research into disabled feminism started with researching my sense-self something I never expected when starting the minor. It is a 'new' world for me. A world I knew about but never researched. Under here I made the work based on myself and from the theory from Johanna Hedva